(edit end of 2024: Originally written when I was seeking to coach Christian single moms around stress, money, and feeding their kids a healthy diet. The advice here is applicable to everyone however, so it stays posted here)
One of the ways women are often accused of being late, is spending too much time in the bathroom! They have to “put on their face” and won’t be caught dead outside the house without it. They have to pick just the right colour combo to match their desired look for the day. Then they have to choose their desired jewelry for the day, an earring broke so now the top has to change and then the bottoms and the socks don’t match then back into the bathroom to put another look together. How many have had some moments when you’d just rather cancel the event thanks to how long it is taking to put that “look” together?!
What many may not realize, is that this is a societal expectation. No one is forcing you to wear make up or jewelry or having matching socks under your dress pants. This is a societal expectation foisted on you by the media, by the entertainment you watch, and by those who have bought into those things themselves, perhaps without even realizing it. Advertisers know that one of a woman’s key needs is to be told she’s beautiful in some way. So they play to the typical woman’s insecurities regarding physical appearance, going so far as to teach via words, images, scenarios and song, that a woman won’t be accepted if she hasn’t bought this make-up line, that jewelry set, this clothing combo at that expensive store, etc. Many women actually believe these lies and go on to teach their own daughters to fall in line as well.
Let me share with you a little secret that could totally change your daily schedule, save you money, and free you from societal pressures all in one fell swoop!
Your beauty is in your worship! Scripture says that we as women are the most beautiful when we are entered fully into that hidden place with God. Let us spend a few minutes reading some Scripture together. Our focus is on our hearts at this moment:
Psalms 29:2 Give unto the LORD the glory due unto his name; worship the LORD in the beauty of holiness.
Psalms 45:10-11 Hearken, O daughter, and consider, and incline thine ear; forget also thine own people, and thy father’s house; 11 So shall the king greatly desire thy beauty: for he is thy Lord; and worship thou him.
Psalms 90:16-17 Let thy work appear unto thy servants, and thy glory unto their children. 17 And let the beauty of the LORD our God be upon us: and establish thou the work of our hands upon us; yea, the work of our hands establish thou it.
Psalms 96:7-9 Give unto the LORD, O ye kindreds of the people, give unto the LORD glory and strength. 8 Give unto the LORD the glory due unto his name: bring an offering, and come into his courts. 9 O worship the LORD in the beauty of holiness: fear before him, all the earth.
Psalms 149:1-6 Praise ye the LORD. Sing unto the LORD a new song, and his praise in the congregation of saints. 2 Let Israel rejoice in him that made him: let the children of Zion be joyful in their King. 3 Let them praise his name in the dance: let them sing praises unto him with the timbrel and harp. 4 For the LORD taketh pleasure in his people: he will beautify the meek with salvation. 5 Let the saints be joyful in glory: let them sing aloud upon their beds. 6 Let the high praises of God be in their mouth, and a twoedged sword in their hand;
Proverbs 31:30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.
Isaiah 52:7 How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of him that bringeth good tidings, that publisheth peace; that bringeth good tidings of good, that publisheth salvation; that saith unto Zion, Thy God reigneth!
Isaiah 61:1-3 The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon me; because the LORD hath anointed me to preach good tidings unto the meek; he hath sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to them that are bound; 2 To proclaim the acceptable year of the LORD, and the day of vengeance of our God; to comfort all that mourn; 3 To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified.
Isaiah 61:10 I will greatly rejoice in the LORD, my soul shall be joyful in my God; for he hath clothed me with the garments of salvation, he hath covered me with the robe of righteousness, as a bridegroom decketh himself with ornaments, and as a bride adorneth herself with her jewels.
1 Timothy 2:9-10 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; 10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works.
1 Peter 3:3-4 Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; 4 But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.
You don’t need make-up to be beautiful. You don’t need jewelry to be beautiful. You don’t need to change up your wardrobe every season to stay beautiful. Your body shape was given to you by God because He thought you’d look your best and function in the earthly call He gave you best with that body shape. God gave you that face and called it good.
All that time spent wasted in the bathroom can be shortened down to a healthy skincare routine and some lip balm and you’re good to go. All that time spent in front of the closet can be whittled down to what YOU like to wear, not what others are demanding you wear. This can literally shave off 30 min to an hour or more of your typical day getting ready for all the appointments and errands you have to do.
Less concern with your appearance will translate into “found money” as you discover just how much you were spending every month on your physical appearance. This “found money” can be used to feed your children better. It can be the difference between paying that bill or watching it bounce for the third month in a row. Some women seriously spend far more money on their physical appearance than they actually realize and this has led to unnecessary financial hardship that could be alleviated by bucking societal norms.
Is there a time to dress up and look nice? Honestly, if your clothes are clean, your hair is brushed and your face is washed, you should look reasonably adequate for any situation. But sometimes you’ll want to dress up a little more for things like weddings, business meetings, court dates, etc. But I challenge you to let God’s idea of your physical beauty to begin shining through. Get outside to let the colour come to your face God’s way. If you have worn make up for years, this particular change may take up to a month before you start seeing your own natural colour returning. If you’ve worn make up since age 12 and now you’re 27, you may not even know what your natural colour looks like because you only see pale when you “take off your face”. Give it at least a month, and spring/summer/fall are the best times in North America to get as much sun as you can. Make sure you engage in a proper skincare regimen during this time.
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What many may not realize, is that this is a societal expectation. No one is forcing you to wear make up or jewelry or having matching socks under your dress pants. This is a societal expectation foisted on you by the media, by the entertainment you watch, and by those who have bought into those things themselves, perhaps without even realizing it. Advertisers know that one of a woman’s key needs is to be told she’s beautiful in some way. So they play to the typical woman’s insecurities regarding physical appearance, going so far as to teach via words, images, scenarios and song, that a woman won’t be accepted if she hasn’t bought this make-up line, that jewelry set, this clothing combo at that expensive store, etc. Many women actually believe these lies and go on to teach their own daughters to fall in line as well.
Less concern with your appearance will translate into “found money” as you discover just how much you were spending every month on your physical appearance. This “found money” can be used to feed your children better. It can be the difference between paying that bill or watching it bounce for the third month in a row. Some women seriously spend far more money on their physical appearance than they actually realize and this has led to unnecessary financial hardship that could be alleviated by bucking societal norms.
